'The Narcissist': A Poem by Ashley

-

I dazzle, I daze, I drug my projects,

Make them sink in my saliva so I can float. 

Truth or dare? Always dare. Challenges and challengers

Always matter, for they can make me dream

That my eyes are actually dice, giving

Me the aim to hurl them at my potential crushes, I mean crushers.

 

I don’t aim high because I’ve made myself the highest.

How? Easy! I teach those lower than me to stare

With downcast eyes, at me, and if they don’t comply, I’ll

Threaten to sink them beneath their blind spots. Threatened,

They’ll beg for mercy, damning me with customised hymns.

‘If you dare hurt me again, you’ll be damned,’ I terrorise in a sugary tone.

 

No one dares protest because everyone knows I can

Hit my aim right on the blind spot. I’ve cast a

Successful spell, for my followers think they love

 Me, though I fear they actually fear me, knowing I’ll shove their heads

In a sink. Then, using a bar of soap and a toilet brush, I’ll

Cleanse their eyes and mouths, so that they’re always my squashed pets.

 

Eyes cleansed? No. They’re infested with blind spots, my objects’ eyes. I

Dare not set them free, my properties, or they’ll turn against me,

Sink my self-esteem down the drain of misery and

Aim to make me the most hated person on earth. Hateful.

I can’t bear those things, so I let those little animals bear with me,

For that’s the only way my dignity will survive--

 

Forever? Not quite. Come to think of it.

Eyes that are not ice, are not dice. They’re alive,

I am living. Others are not wheels customised for my twisted need—I

Dare say—to twist, roll and victimise like squashed paper dice.

‘Aim to win every heart by force and you’ll

Sink your loved ones out of sight,’ a daring person finally dares tell me,

 

And he is right. I promise not to let my wounded ego sink

Partly for myself and partly for

Those who care daringly, truly and riskily. ‘Sorry, really,’ I say and aim

To love myself, unconditionally. Tears well up in my eyes,

Which are now soft,, no longer hard as icy dice. I dare

Myself to stop having those nightmares in which I shriek, ‘I, I, I!’

Aye aye!

 

 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

27 Things I’ve Learnt in 27 Years

-
Three days late but here it is – a list of the 27 things I’ve learnt in 27 years, one I was supposed to write on my birthday on 17 Sep. Better late than never I suppose, so here I am, writing and reflecting. I’m not sure how many of the lessons I’ve learnt are universal or even if they would still apply to me a year or ten later, however change and growth are to be embraced and celebrated, so here goes:   1)     Being flexible and adaptable doesn’t mean you’re being false to yourself. Instead, flexibility and adaptability are qualities that will mentor your evolving self towards greater self-awareness and self-knowledge, opening your eyes to your previously untapped potentials. 2)     Some dreams take longer to come true but that’s OK, or in fact more than – the process is perhaps to be celebrated. As an aspiring novelist and a newbie blogger, I have learnt that writing is not the only act that will get my novel written and that completing blog...
Read more

Five Fabulously Gorgeous Non-Fiction Books Under 200 Pages That Will Get You Back on Your Productive Feet

-
   Hi everyone 💖 How are you (booked up) today? Are you all booked up by work or by books? If it’s the former, you are in the right place and if it’s the latter, by what books – fiction or non-fiction? If you have been reading too much non-fiction and need a break to prevent your no-longer-all-fired-up-brain from being all fried up, check out this post , in which I recommend eleven electric novellas under 200 pages that will hopefully help you relax, restore and/or reset your brains, so that you are back on your productive feet. If you have been reading too much fiction and desperately in need of a dramatic change of scene or a change of the dramatic scene you keep finding yourself finding however, I can assure you, without an ounce of doubt, that you are reading the right post indeed.    ‘Wait, what about us, those who are far from booked up in any sense of the phrase? Have you forgotten us, you foolish writer of this post, hmm?’ That, my friends, is the sound ...
Read more

Eleven Things You’d Relate to If You’re Both a Prose and Poetry Writer

-
   Hello everyone! How are you? Thank God it doesn’t rhyme this time around. Phew. My sentences have become too rhyming nowadays, so imagine my relief my friends, imagine my relief indeed! Gosh! All those daft rhythmic rubbish again! What to do? Well, I think writing this listicle’s what to do. As the self-explanatory title suggests, in this post I share eleven things you’d relate to if you’re both a prose and poetry writer like me, or to put it more simply, a confused writer. Nah just kidding. Anyway, let’s dive into that list!   1)     Most of the time, your poetry doesn’t rhyme and your prose does – especially when you don’t want it to. 2)     Your text messages read like song lyrics and although you’re not a songwriter – at least not formally – your song lyrics read like text messages. 3)     Procrastination will often try to charm you into writing a novel when you’re working on your poem and vice versa. 4) ...
Read more